Wednesday, May 8, 2013

You're right. It's not me, it IS you...

Disclaimer: I found this in drafts from forever ago. I held off on posting it because at the time the guy did read this blog and I didn't feel it would be right morally to shame him so publicly, with him watching. Knowing he'd be squirming. So now seems right since I just posted my farewell to you followers, here's one last gem about a single MOB.


I once met a guy who seemed like a potential example of What It Should Look Like.  In one month's time, we went on 2 coffee dates; we had a nice time talking and laughing. There was no kissing or hand-holding. We texted occasionally and seemed to both respect each other having a very busy schedule.

And then:

I feel rushed... Things are moving too fast... I feel pressured, like there's an expectation on me. It's nothing you've done, you haven't pressured me or rushed things. I know, two coffee dates isn't much. And I know I was the one to ask you out... It's not you, it's me. It's an external pressure. And I really like being single, being able to explore my options and I feel like there's this pressure...But I like spending time with you too. You're insanely gorgeous and it's nice to be around someone who can hold an intelligent conversation. I selfishly don't even want to tell you this, because I know you don't want your time wasted and you aren't looking for a casual thing and I'm worried you're not going to want to see me again.

Come on! That all translates into, "If I tell you this and you DO keep seeing me, I don't have to feel bad about hooking up with other women, because I gave you the heads up. Sweet!"

I appreciate his 'brutal honesty.' It stopped me from wasting anymore of my time.

But that is not what it should look like. It's what friends with benefits looks like.

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