You're right. It's not me, it IS you...

Disclaimer: I found this in drafts from forever ago. I held off on posting it because at the time the guy did read this blog and I didn't feel it would be right morally to shame him so publicly, with him watching. Knowing he'd be squirming. So now seems right since I just posted my farewell to you followers, here's one last gem about a single MOB.

 

I once met a guy who seemed like a potential example of What It Should Look Like.  In one month's time, we went on 2 coffee dates; we had a nice time talking and laughing. There was no kissing or hand-holding. We texted occasionally and seemed to both respect each other having a very busy schedule.

And then:

I feel rushed... Things are moving too fast... I feel pressured, like there's an expectation on me. It's nothing you've done, you haven't pressured me or rushed things. I know, two coffee dates isn't much. And I know I was the one to ask you out... It's not you, it's me. It's an external pressure. And I really like being single, being able to explore my options and I feel like there's this pressure...But I like spending time with you too. You're insanely gorgeous and it's nice to be around someone who can hold an intelligent conversation. I selfishly don't even want to tell you this, because I know you don't want your time wasted and you aren't looking for a casual thing and I'm worried you're not going to want to see me again.

Come on! That all translates into, "If I tell you this and you DO keep seeing me, I don't have to feel bad about hooking up with other women, because I gave you the heads up. Sweet!"

I appreciate his 'brutal honesty.' It stopped me from wasting anymore of my time.


But that is not what it should look like. It's what friends with benefits looks like.

Farewell

Dear "MOB" Followers,

There hasn't been a true update on this site since last April--over a year. So clearly the MOB settled down.

I no longer have relevance to this blog personally and will only be able to update it if/when friends send me their ridiculous stories (not often, not likely).

However, if you have enjoyed following me, you can now follow my current real life happenings over here This Life Would Kill Me If I Didn't Have You. And actually, my latest blog is a perfect example of What It Should Look Like.

So, please look for me over there. Come join the party and follow that blog. (And let me know some others that you follow cuz I'm looking to spice my Dashboard up)

Love always,
Me

You Sexy

Dear Men of Baltimore,
Shall we start blaming sunny days and 695?
Honking at me on the beltway and bellowing "you sexy, can I call?" over the sounds of traffic is so tempting...but not.
Keep your eyes in the road, and please remember we women are prizes. You need to have more to offer. I'm not going to react to every person that thinks I'm attractive. Substance, people!
Love always,
Me

I should've known you'd be back in the spring

Dear Men of Baltimore,
Between me working with kids and being sick, I haven't seen much of you lately. But I should've known you'd speak up again now that the weather is nice.
I'm sure we've talked about this before, but it obviously needs repeating. If your line is telling me you want to be my friend on the side, and this conversation is occurring at a gas station, you really can just keep on driving.
Thanks for offering to help me put air in my tires though. That made you seem way less sketchy.
Love,
Me

Sunny Day

Dear MOB,
You've got to be joking... I haven't heard from you in AGES. But on the first true springlike day, you're back.
If you're walking home from the liquor store at 2:30, don't "Hey Girl" me when my car is at a stop sign. I mean, what..."ohh baby, that was such a great line that I'd like to give you a ride home." yeah, no.

Well, ya know... No.

Dear Men of Baltimore,

I've told you this before: I don't just speak for myself in this blog. My girlfriends are less than impressed with you too. As my one friend put it today, "I think they're just getting lazier."

One of Baltimore's classiest approached her in a 7-11 this morning and bypassed all standard greetings, instead opting to open with, "Yo, ya gotta man or sumthin?"
She replied yes and held up her hand, displaying a diamond-clad ring finger, then walked on to continue her shopping (and escape his rank BO).
He then followed her around the store and began the all-too-common protest we hear (the implication that monogamy doesn't matter). He started with, "Well, ya know..." and she quickly shut him down with a simple and firm, "No."

Tell me, MOB, are there many Women of Baltimore who buy into that? I personally don't know any females who that crap has worked on, but if I'm wrong, please tell me! Otherwise, can you explain what it is about you that is SO incredible you think you can turn classy women into cheaters? Because we just aren't seeing it...

Hollaback!

Dear Men of Baltimore,

I am not the only one who finds you to be offensive/inappropriate.

For other women's perspective please visit:
http://bmore.ihollaback.org/
https://www.facebook.com/HollabackBmore?sk=info

Sincerely,
Me & Lots More Baltimore Women